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21 more things = 42

The last post was the 21 things I KNOW at 42. At the end I said I'd consider writing 21 more things to make it 42 in total & then ...


Apparently My Mother's Not a Genius...

Yesterday I had the pleasure of having several good conversations with a woman whose take on things I like. From the appetizer of politics of African centered cultural interactions and empty intellectualism to the main course on education and child rearing, and ending with a night cap on relationships. These in depth chats began at a kitchen table, traveled to a dance class and back and wound up on a staircase and in a doorway. We don't talk much but appreciate the opportunity to be around each other when the planets and airfare gods are in alignment.

It was in the car, driving in the rain with the defoggers that never quite worked, fighting for our lives to see the highway before and behind, that the topic of Christmas came up. Well, actually, the topic was a cancelled wedding that led to Christmas being cancelled as well. Her mother decided not to do Christmas gifts at some point in her life and instead opted to give her children the gift of travel. She saved up to send her children somewhere new in the world annually. As I listened to her tell her story, I realized how genius this plan was.

As a parent, if you give the gift of a cell phone, you help yourself to hefty bills and conversations about said bills. If you give gaming systems, you give the gift of distraction, and the possibility of planting roots in furniture and becoming sedentary. Pick a gift and imagine its future irrelevance and the money wasted on it. We often say we want to give our children the world and then only give them the block or the world of television. What better way to do so than to actually hand over a passport to the world? My own mother's a smart cookie but even she didn't come up with that one.

No point in wishing she had now. I'm responsible for shaping my experiences in the world now and my own world view. Maybe it's time I treat myself like my own child and give unto me in this fashion. "Girl, take this ticket to _______________. I love you!" Yeah...I think that's the move, and it falls right in line with me living bigger and deffer. I'm excited.

Look out for my tailpipe.

Watch me move.


  1. that's a wonderful idea,
    but i think i'd want to go with her
    cause i'd wanna see, too!

    i've always been interested in
    a wilderness survival experience for my daughters as well as another way for them to build confidence in themselves and be comfortable in nature,
    or as a part of a rites of passage.

  2. even sweeter. & that happened for the as well.