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Monday

Goin To the Well With a Deeper Bucket


"Satisfaction will come to those who please themselves."


I got that gem from a children's book, title escapes me though.

Some time back I expressed an EXTREME sense of boredom. This routine has done me in and made me tired in my youth in ways that are unacceptable. The same people, places, and things are just NOT ENOUGH anymore. I had dreams of packing it all up and doing what they do in movies--spin a globe and buy a 1-way ticket to wherever my finger stops the twirl. Truth is, I have responsibilities. I have a mother whose health and abilities are not what any of us envisioned, and the prospect of being left alone to totally fend for self freaks her out. Understood. I have a mission here, a path I started walking that I must see to the final yellow brick. Another color will pick up from there and I will be free to make other moves, without guilt or unavoidable responsibilities. In the meantime, I have GOT TO find something to do with all of this energy that feels wasted. These things may or may not be major, but they will help me pass the time and grow other things to put on the list. Experience breeds broader desires which lead to bigger goals and greater hustle. The NuNu (Bucket-like List) is as follows:

take a jewelry making class

design & make my own dress (you out there Sophiela & Sophiela's Mama?)

learn to DJ & do at least 1 set at a party

go to a nude beach

write a collection of erotic short stories

have at least 1 of these books i've written published (then write some more & publish them)

take motorcycle lessons & buy a custom designed Chopper

coach girls track

teach middle (happening sooner rather than later) &/or high school--consider becoming a professor

go on the 10-day silence retreat

return to Colorado at least once (must meet K.B.'s children)

go zip lining (check), white water rafting (check), kayaking (check), hang gliding

become a skilled equestrian (look it up!)

learn to swim

eat my way across Asia (Anthony Bourdain produced dreams)

make an offering to Osun off a Cuban shoreline

knit or crochet SOMETHING

get off the sabar short bus

dance "professionally" again (for the uninformed--there are no poles involved here)

play in the kickball league

paint something and frame it in my home

adopt something or someone




What do you want to do that you aren't? What's stopping you? Start filling your own bucket, draw from the depths of your own well.

Watch me move.

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