How do you know when Fall has officially arrived? No, it isn't because September 21st has come and gone. There are some surefire ways to recognize that Summer has put you in its rear view mirror & Fall is subletting.
White folks are wearing coats (and hats).
This is really the only sign necessary. White people tend to be the ones out in all types of frigidity wearing shorts & long sleeved shirts. They used to seem immune to cold altogether but in recent years Global Warming's got everyone all confused. And after last winter, I'm sure no one--even white people--is trying to get caught out in the elements when the weather meant for the Arctic Circle makes a wrong turn & lands in your hood.
You are no longer concerned about covering up that pedicure you just spent $30 on.
Women LOVE open toe shoe season, AKA Summer. Men LOVE to get a chance to peek at women's dogs to see what we're working with & skip the surprises. Boomerang flashback. Many of us will keep up our feet no matter the season, but won't pay for all the designs & fancy footwork for feet that MUST now be covered by socks.
Those boots chicks have been wearing all summer suddenly look like the BEST IDEA EVER!
How many times in the 2 months of 90 degree heat did you look at a woman wearing boots & say a silent prayer for her toes? When summer hits I can barely even look directly at a shoe. Anything requiring a sock becomes the devil & laces get reserved chicks wearing wigs & those requiring extra strength girdles. I fall into neither category & therefore abandoned ship on real shoes. Sandals galore. But now...yeah, those boots look like my driver's license & insurance card: shouldn't leave home without them. Unfortunately, thanks to this toe injury, wearing a sock today near 'bout drove me to drink. I will, however, not be swayed from purchasing dope boots in anticipation of being able to have this foot totally enclosed.
Everyone you've been dealing with casually is being rated for CuddleBunny potential.
I LOVE living alone. It's one of the best things about being an adult & 1 of the greatest life experiences I've had. Still, 1 of my favorite things is to lay on the couch, between the legs of my Love, & watch movies under covers. Being bunned up, using another's body heat for warmth is 1 of the great benefits of companionship. Having someone wrap their whole self around me in the bed at night (until the "a'ight, get off me" countdown begins) makes me feel special, warm, & protected. Summa'y'all are eyeing folks now to see if they qualify to be your own personal warmer.
The person you've just been chillin' with for the summer hands you a set of keys & has cleared 2 drawers for you.
You may not have noticed the chill in the air, but the person you've been hanging out with has. You laughed a lot this summer & you never had 1 drama filled moment. The schedule you keep has worked out so far but it's time to put blankets on the bed. The person you've been keeping light weight time with doesn't want to have to come to the door for you anymore & needs you to know just how welcome you are to let yourself in & join the togetherness party. So, the keys have been put on a cute little chain from 1 of the many places you went this summer. They went back for it just to let you know how serious they are about
You no longer care what night it is at the club.
The weekend just passed & you may have hung outside in a line waiting to get in. In a few more weeks, many of you will abandon those lines for warmer options. Aubrey (Drake) at Love [the club] or not...it's just not sexy to be standing outside wearing down coats & fur lined boots, only to make it in & need a locker to store your snowsuit in favor of lighter, luder (yeah I said it) wears underneath. Besides, if you've already found your CuddleBunny, you prefer more private parties.
Treat yourself to a fly coat. Ladies, get up on the latest boot trends (that make sense). & everybody pay attention to the signs. They're all around.
Watch me move.