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21 more things = 42

The last post was the 21 things I KNOW at 42. At the end I said I'd consider writing 21 more things to make it 42 in total & then ...


From 13 to 30

I’m not one for going to the mountaintop, but I must give it to the Facebook Gawds for really being on their G when it comes to this social networking thing. As many people as I’ve had to give the “WHO?” side-eye to, as well as the “we don’t like each other in real life” eyebrow raise, I’ve had some great surprises. I’ve been given more regular access to my Jr. High school best friend, reconnected with the boy I was in love with in 7th grade, & 1/3 of my 2nd set of college roommates who I’ve not seen in 16 years. Damn...was that a word problem? Moving on. My college girl crew has been reconnected & some rugged fences have been mended, rebuilding a support system of women friends who don’t live in the same cities. I’ve had an opportunity to see how many of the cats I once swooned over haven’t preserved their sexy & how not good some of us have been to ourselves over the years. Life’s hard sometimes. I know.

What I LOVE the most when my past has collided with my present is folks jumpin out with their impressions of me way back when. I’m fascinated by the picture they paint of the girl they knew & how similar she is, in both our opinions, to the woman I am today. As a girl I wasn’t the chick boys typically liked outwardly. They told me about it while they chased the other girls like dogs chase their tails. I was the chick with the natural hair, the veggie burger & avocado sandwiches in my lunch, & the African 1st, middleS (yes, plural) & last name. & then my breasts [thankfully] had the nerve to come in late.

In the 9th grade I was subconsciously in my light skinned, curly hair phase. I would never have admitted to this, & just got there in my mind like yesterday, because my then boyfriend was the most beautiful brownin’ from the high school I was s’posed to feed into. His real name was Kevin White. & even with the help of the FB Gawds I wouldn’t look for anyone with such a common name. It’d be like trying to find a needle in a needle stack. Hell, my cousin’s fiance’s name is Kevin White & it certainly ain’t him. Luckily, there aren’t too many of me out there, so if you’re searching, it won’t be hard to find me. But I digress. I used’ta be so proud of Kevin since I was all of 14 years old with a boyfriend in high school. Not too many of the girls could say that. Kevin taught me how to kiss a few weeks before my dad flew out to give me “the talk” about what a young lady my age should or shouldn’t be doing with boys. It wouldn’t be the 1st time a parent was short on the jump.

Anywho, I was all sprung off of a few of the pretty boys in my school, & a few of them swore they like me. 1 in particular was just my friend. He was funny, & kind & looked out for me. He also had beautiful lips. (That is was my thing.) He told me he liked me but I was busy having a boyfriend in high school while I waited for the availability of My Shawny (that’s really what I called him) to dump that Greek chick he was dealing with. So, Pretty Lips got no play. Still, all these years later, he remembers me & consulted the FB Gawds to grant him the reconnect. The other day I found him, all growed up, in my inbox & with a friend request. The last former classmate to track me down has turned into a dramatic catalogue of schitzophrenic moments so I really had to consider whether I’d accept. Just like everyone else, Pretty Lips offered his take on me when I was a shorty.

1st he said:
you've always had cornrolls, or kept it all natural. little, small queen(petite). poetry of a real queen of a woman you are. i can remember the last book reading, library assignment, and conversation we had. but then again i could trip up like hop scotch.

Then he said:
You know your in the presence of a queen when all you think of is how do you even speak to one. Do you bow first, do you say my lady, etc. You always was a strong woman, not a teenager or girl, in school. I always knew what kind of woman you may turn out to be. The same woman that you where in school you seem to be today. Yeah i thought you was short but sexy, strong headed, intelligent as hell, smart, mature, and didn't take shit from nobody. For one i think you intimadated some people with just a look when people got on your nerves. I remember the dresses you used to wear and your sexy bowed legs for your height. You even intimadated me even though you never did it intentionally to me or to me personally. Just thought you would get a kick out of knowing that you are the Little Queen that got away. I always have and will have a special place in my heart for you. Don't ask me why other than i was extremely fond of you and i didn't express it, or maybe i did. Was to scared of you, the Queen, beheading me and your mom. LOL. Remember me singing "Aisha" all the time jokingly. It was really how i felt than it being a joke. You'll always be a great friend of mine and it's my pleasure to be re-acquainted with you.

I took a couple things away from this exchange.

1. Who you are is a part of us, & evident to others, EARLIER than we think. We walk with our own gifts daily & don’t acknowledge them ‘cuz they’re so regular to us.
2. Some things just don’t change. For those of you who believe this came about as I became an adult…I’ve always been like this. My friend from Jr. High school confirms it.
3. Everybody remembers my mom didn't play.

Watch me move.

PS-anybody waiting for me to do a wrap-up of the BET Hip Hop Awards may have to wait til it comes on again. It was so uneventful to me that I just couldn't think of anything worth writing. Maybe I'll just address the cyphers...or maybe I'll just pretend it never happened. Sorry.


  1. Let me save you cypher time with some Cliff Notes:
    - Big Sean and Yeezy kilt it. Kilt it ded.
    - Rev. Run was fresher than I thought he'd be.
    - Ice Cube and his kids were extra eh.

    Everyone else was mediocrity.

  2. HA! I was surprisingly underwhelmed by 'Ye & Common. I was impressed by lil Diggy Simmons enough to go check out his mixtape. If I was 15 he'd be all over my iPod & the walls of my room. Honestly...I can't recall another moment.

    I don't recall many actual awards being given out on the AWARDS show & the performances made me sleepy. ESPECIALLY Big Boi & Yelawolf.

    Well, there you have it. My wrap up. LOL!

  3. This is just so sweet. I have had a couple of sweet notes like this as well, thanks to fb, and it is always really touching. I love fb for all the reasons you said. Well written.

  4. Yeah, I thought Common was gonna come a little fresher than that. I was disappointed. Then again, what's supposed to top Ace Hood, Juelz Santana, Fabolous and Jadakiss from 2008? Or Mos Def, Black Thought and Eminem from 2009?

    I almost feel bad for 2010. They couldn't even sniff the same level.