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21 more things = 42

The last post was the 21 things I KNOW at 42. At the end I said I'd consider writing 21 more things to make it 42 in total & then ...


Love Is Supreme

It’s Valentime’s Valentine’s Day! Based on my scroll through the feed on FB it seems the excitement about this day is split right down the middle. The line seems to have been drawn by a penis shaped pen. Apparently, dudes don’t feel this holiday, calling it propaganda serving to separate them from their hard earned duckets for these chicks who should just be glad somebody looked at them in the 1st place. Ahhhhh yes…the Scrubs’ response to Valentine’s Day!

This is the holiday where a bunch of men & men in training get together at a bar, sippin’ on tumblers of Haterade, doggin’ The Man for giving a day to women. This is the kind of thing that makes it evident that we don’t read much & subscribe to GroupThink as if we actually READ so much as a magazine. There are a couple of myths that need to be dispelled.

1. The notion that love or things related to love are specifically designed for women is beyond ridiculous. Who do you think women are out here loving & wanting to be loved by? I haven’t met a woman in love YET who wasn’t excited about the approach of the day she gets to shower EXTRA love on her man. I also haven’t met a woman in love YET who has decided that this day is ONLY for her & sits back waiting to see how her dude is gon’ trick out for her.

2. What man who loves a woman doesn’t want to do something EXTRA for her? Any man who’s done something extra for his Lady Love knows that he wins in the end. This all sounds like the ridiculous gospel spread by cats who don’t adequately show love throughout the year. This is not even about money spent. Have you rubbed your lady’s feet? Have you gone to the theatre with her against your will simply because she loves it? Have you rushed home with dinner in hand or damn near burned down the kitchen trying to cook so she wouldn’t have to at least once? Have you TOLD her to get out of the house, you’ll handle YOUR kids? The average woman doesn’t have her feet up, waiting for a parade of baubles & trinkets.

3. Since it’s not about spending wild dollar amounts, did it cross your mind that a well-stated card goes a long way? The card aisle at your local drug or grocery store intimidates you. All that Shakespearean language (to you) reads like Greek. Poetry ain’t no more than 16 bars to you. I got you. But do you have at least 1 female friend who could help you pick out something poignant & timeless to woo your woman?

4. Brothas who go the extra mile find that they have women in their lives willing to walk an extra mile with them, come rain or shine, hell or high water. Secret: that goes for any woman in your life--Ya Momma, sister, grandmother, play cousin, best friend… In the end, you may come up off of $12 in cards that bring a smile to someone who has probably gone the distance to make your ashy behind smile. If you’re truly considerate, you may come home with something with buds--& not of the marychuwanna sort--& brought home a small token of your affections.

5. Even if you don’t identify with the clear capitalist overtones of damn near EVERY major holiday we celebrate in these United States, love itself is something we ALL could stand a little more of. Adjust your stinkin’ thinkin’. Instead of worrying about how many women you have to buy things for (& perhaps you need to shut down your stable), just spread love—again, not related to the stable--& be kinder to people today than you were yesterday & probably will be tomorrow. Spend some time being good to your self, the result will automatically be you sharing your piece of peace.

These things are what we make them. No need to be mad at the masses when you can decide what this day means to & for you.

Soapbox moment over.

While I’ve got your attention, let me wish a Happy Valentime’s Valentine’s Day to all of you, my family, my friends, & to say thank you to The Bestie for always being an awesome example of what a loving man is & can do. Thanks for remembering me despite your mind & heart being otherwise occupied. I love you, Babe! To those who've showered love on me in last three60five, I appreciate all you've done for me & been to me.

Watch me move.

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