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21 more things = 42

The last post was the 21 things I KNOW at 42. At the end I said I'd consider writing 21 more things to make it 42 in total & then ...


Glad Rags

It's April, 1 month before Wedding Season officially begins. Soon I'll be sick to death of white dresses & For-the Day princesses lighting unity candles & jumping brooms. It isn't because I don't love love, but after a while the excess of it all, at least for me, gets to be a bit much. Everyone's trying so hard to be different in their nuptials that they all wind up being the same.

Once upon a time I was planning my own wedding. Unlike my sista-friend who'd had her wedding planned out & preserved in sheet protectors since her freshman year in college, I had never gone so far as to envision my special day. Remember, I'm the girl who, at 13, wrote in her journal about marrying 3 times, the 3rd time to my 1 true love who I'd known most of my life. I'll tell that story, maybe, another time. As I planned my own wedding though, I found it to be a ridiculous exercise. I couldn't find a model to fit who I am & certainly wasn't in the mood to be recreating the wheel. The 1 part I did get into was figuring out what I was going to wear.

As a kid who is of what would be considered a diverse background, I wanted my dress to reflect that. More than that, my parents would give me the STRONG 0______0 if I showed up with some Euro-style white gown. The only African concept not required of me would be to have my wedding in Africa. Other than that, there needs to be some African fabric, some African languages, an African inspired ritual, some African inspired cuisine, & the commitment to give any pets African names. Oh, it's not a game with Mama & Baba K. I'm older now, & not as worried about what they want because I'm the 1 who has to be OK with my decisions especially since I'm over 30 & ALL the duckets would most likely come from my own accounts.

Because I'm in a wedding in May, attending another in the same month, I'm super aware of what's happening with wedding dresses out here in these aisles. I saw this dress

& started plotting on who I could marry by the end of the year. The dress is only one hunnid & fitty-nine dollaz. You read correctly. The bang for the buck alone makes me feel like I should just buy it 1 size too big & worry about alterations in the next 2-to-however many years it takes. I can really see givin' 'em fevah in all my grace & elegance next to a dapper gentleman who has removed swag from his vocabulary but can't shake it 'cause it's part of who he is. Yeah...I can see it.

But then there was this 1

You couldn't tell me NATHAN in this dress. Not. Nathan. $219. That's better than David's Formal & Bridal prices, before the scrapes & bruises when they have the running of the brides.

I like these dresses so much that, knowing I'm not getting married, I'd still help a friend purchase 1 of them so she could have the pleasure of being a vision of loveliness on her magical day, being turned from a peasant to a princess. She has the rest of her life to be a pauper, paying off wedding debt; no need to go into hock on the dress alone. I'm personally at a point in my life where I get the desire to have a grand party in honor of love & partnership, but if I can't live in it, I'm not tryna hear about thousands of dollars for too much of anything. Payment plans for a wedding? No ma'am. 1 day in my life just cannot cost more than several months of my life combined sayeth she without a ring. I ain't mad at nobody's vision though. So, ladies with heavy rang fangaz, have at it. Create your Bride-to-be Barbie fantasy & make it a day or night to remember. Just keep in mind that it's about the days after, not the 1 that lives in the bubbles rising to the top of a champagne flute. Happy husband hunting. Wishing you blessed unions.

Watch me move.


  1. Hola Aweezy,

    Both of these dresses are fiyah but two is my fave. Please please please wear it and look all the way fierce. Much like you I never really planned my wedding when I was younger. I never envisioned myself married...definitely successful career-wise with a killer handbag and shoe collection but never shackled to one dude. This could explain my current situation but that's a whole other story.

    Anywho I've recently decided that I want this ring (http://tacori.com/Engagement-Rings#/2565RD9) and would like to tie the knot in St. John at sunset. I'm almost positive I'm not compromising on any of these things but if there were some vintage ring that his grannie wore I might be inclined to change it up...I say might.

    Luckily for me I don't suffer from the 27 dresses syndrome...my friends just have babies!

  2. OK...I SEE YOU!! You want yo rang fangah to be all blingy bob. I ain't mad at you. Now, imagine me with the most petite childlike hands and not really having a love affair with diamonds. We walked in Helzberg Diamonds & the saleswoman saw black folks & decided we MUST want the biggest rocks known to man. She all but outfitted me with the Hope diamond. I finally asked her if she'd paid attention to the size of my hands. She turned beet red & went in search of some more modest options. I picked out something very understated but very pretty. He & I were both satisfied but saleswoman was ULTRA confused.

    My girlfriend who is taller & bigger than me said she was looking for something that went with her fabulous side & her Adidas track suit. That rang you want certainly goes with the career, the handbags & the shoe collection. I ain't mad atcha, my hand just ain't strong enough to carry that.