**Note-please excuse this very personal, but now publicly shared moment between me & the Bestie.
Hey (poking you in the arm)!! You remember this?
“Shopper,” she whispered in my ear and fell back to the couch, delighted at the fact that I’m voluntarily telling on myself. See her, she knows me. Whether I choose to admit or not. How much does she know? I couldn’t tell you. But she hasn’t been wrong yet.
Two face to faces six months apart, some dozen phone conversations and hundreds of text messages and she’s getting me.
I told her I wouldn’t leave this time. I had no way of making her believe me other than pointing out the fact that I never made that promise before. See because of her, I think I hurt when I vanished. I’m not really sure what kind of hurt it was. I’m scared to find out. I’m going to ask her when this piece is complete. I have to. A part of me empathizes with her emotion. It’s part of the reason why I picked that hectic day to finally see her. I owed her that. And more. Her, is a blessing. That feeling you get from just being appreciated as you are…it’s a good feeling.
She told me that the circumstance under which this camaraderie was forged was wack. From her perspective and mine, she’s absolutely correct. The wackness of it is short lived when you reflect on the present. Her, has things in common with me and that’s refreshing. Relaxing too. And though we’re not completely in a relaxation state, that’s the direction we’re facing. Sun’s in our face.
But don’t misunderstand my praise for her and what’s between us as a declaration of her being “the one for me” or something along that line. Yes, she is smart and sexy to boot. Yes, she’s got a thing for a fresh pair of sneakers like me. Yes, she’s creative and innovative. And yes, in a pair of heels has a strut badder than Nia’s in The Best Man. But all that doesn’t mean I’m obligated to pursue her. The code was written in my DNA but I’ve made some changes to it as of late and I have to admit, I’m really digging the results. The other day, she texted me to thank me for the warmth and comfort of my friendship so I have to say she’s digging them too.
I'mma gon' & stand tall--like this gorgeous shoe--& wait til you remember THAT. This ain't no Return to Sender type friendship, Boo. We're a gang. You gotta get jumped out or killed to leave this. So, do what you need to do to get right so we can talk & move this silliness aside.
Watch me move (w/a place holder for the Bestie.)