Shoe Personality of the Week: 6/23/13

Striated (verb)- to have linear marks, ridges, grooves on a surface that are often one of a number of similar parallel features.

My life is a series of parallel lines. I'm compartmentalized but in a way where no 1 thing is any more or less important than the next. My battle is to keep my head above water right now. The tide is high, the waves are choppy & my floaties seem to have sprung an air leak. It's realler than it's ever been for me. Even as I make this admission, I'm keenly aware of the way that I look as I navigate these treacherous waters. I'm broke financially challenged but don't look it. There's no food in my refrigerator but I don't look hungry. Most of us can only identify struggle when it is obvious, & even then we don't reach out to assist. The way that I appear says I don't need help & my pride is as high as the tide so I also don't know how to ask.

Moving into counseling, a helping profession, I am faced with having to identify my own shit. How can I promote the need for us to seek & accept help when I struggle with seeking & accepting it myself? I'm operating in survival mode, where many of us operate, missing the times in my Life when I was able to do much more living. My immediate goal is to get back there, however, the goal might need to be seeking counsel so that I can unlearn this learned behavior. But, like everyone else in my position, Imma put that on the back burner so I can figure out what I can eat today.

Watch me move.

Post Script- I've always been honest in these posts. This level of honesty is freeing, humbling, & frightening. Consider that when people are sharing their lives with you.