Shoe Personality of the Week: 8/16/2010

My Monday thru Friday is about to change. The freedom to come & go as I please will no longer exist in about 23 hours. & that’s fine. This is the part of the year that I both anticipate & dread at the same time. The dreading is simply resistance to the idea of change & having to give up something so precious to me—the Summer. Anticipation runs high though. For the 1st time in 5 years I’ll be back with the middle ground of the older babies. While everyone else gives up the Stink Face when I tell them 6th graders are in my not so distant future I have nothing but excitement. Perhaps I’m naïve. Perhaps I don't know my ass from my elbow & really should run. Perhaps I know better than them who I can handle.

This, my 4th year, will begin with my 3rd new classroom & my 3rd school within the same entity. I don’t know how many of my colleagues can say that they’ve literally worked with all 3 staffs under our huge umbrella, but I’m proud to be 1 who can. All these transitions have taught me something, given me something else for my arsenal, & kept me 1 step ahead of the game. There are few surprises, even with the surprises, here. Even in all my optimism I know it won’t all be good. I know I’m preparing for battle & hoping to avoid combat. I will be cheered on & set u p at the same time. My successes will be overlooked due to the strange climate of the school system I work for & the weight of this regime pressing on the necks of those over me. Some really stupid decisions will get made this year, to top the really stupid decisions of last year. Hopefully, I will have the strength to laugh through them like I did then. Prepared for battle, hoping to avoid combat.

I look forward to beginning the 9-month gestation of growing with a new batch of students. Rejoining my colleague friends is always fun; we cut up before we cut out to cut into the school year. I can’t wait to see what this school year will bring, but I’m not interested in rushing in. My eyes & ears are wide open & I’m crafting a few booby traps for those who are paid to pretend they’re smarter than me but have proven not to be. They will still come with their bag of tricks, prepared to dismantle my/our progress. I don’t sleep on the job. Prepared for battle, hoping to avoid combat.

Here, before going in, less that 24 hours from this now moment, I am taking the time to forgive myself my mistakes & embrace the fact that I can NOT do it all. Just like in years prior, I intend to return home from this tour of duty shrapnel-free, still passionate enough to return for another tour. Let it begin.

Watch me move.

Post Script—if I was even as young as my 20’s….I would own these shoes!!